We hope you liked our funny, sexy birthday poem because this time, we're giving you some sexy birthday wishes and quotes which are also amusing and funny.
Perfect to use for the birthday of your love and always effective since they have birthday humor. Enjoy!
"People are more violently opposed to fur than leather because it's safer to pick on rich women than motorcycle gangs. Happy birthday!"
"Booze is the answer. I don't remember the question. So let's just drink and celebrate your birthday!"
"Do infants have as much fun in infancy as adults do in adultery? Regardless of the answer, you're still getting older, so happy birthday!"
"Some mornings, it's just not worth chewing through the leather straps." - Emo Phillips
"My husband's German. Every night I get dressed up as Poland and he invades me." - Bette Midler
"Give a man free hands, and you'll know where to find them." - Mae West
"Graze on my lips; and if those hills be dry, stray lower, where the pleasant fountains lie." - William Shakespeare
"It's the good girls that keep the diaries; the bad girls never have the time." - Tallulah Bankhead
"Give me chastity and continence- but not yet." - Saint Augustine
Showing posts with label Funny. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Funny. Show all posts
Birthday Love Qoutes and Wishes
How do you expect me to remember your birthday, when you never look any older? Happy birthday!
Many many happy returns of the day
It's another day 4 u. God picked another petals on your flower, wishing your flowers may bloom for year.
Some like sunday some like monday, but I like your birthday. Happy birthday my sweetheart.
I send to you warm wishes,that your happiness will be as wonderful as the happiness, you have always given me. Wish you happy birthday.
I may be watching the ufc 115 live stream, but it's you that's always in my dream. Happy birthday my love.
Many many happy returns of the day
It's another day 4 u. God picked another petals on your flower, wishing your flowers may bloom for year.
Some like sunday some like monday, but I like your birthday. Happy birthday my sweetheart.
I send to you warm wishes,that your happiness will be as wonderful as the happiness, you have always given me. Wish you happy birthday.
I may be watching the ufc 115 live stream, but it's you that's always in my dream. Happy birthday my love.
Funny Quotes For Saying Happy Birthday
"It's your birthday, another year down the drain!"
"Middle age is showing your age around your middle."
"The only birthday's more special than this one are the ones to come."
"The best way to grow old is to start young!"
"Your only as old as you feel, be sure and feel someone young!"
These collection is sponsored by UFC 111 Live Stream and Arnica Home Remedies
"Middle age is showing your age around your middle."
"The only birthday's more special than this one are the ones to come."
"The best way to grow old is to start young!"
"Your only as old as you feel, be sure and feel someone young!"
These collection is sponsored by UFC 111 Live Stream and Arnica Home Remedies
Birthday Quotes
And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years.
The old believe everything; the middle aged suspect everything: the young know everything.
It takes a long time to grow young.
You know you're old when you're watching the Pacquiao vs Clottey live stream online.
Your birthday is a special time to celebrate the gift of 'you' to the world.
The secret to staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.
A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.
You're old when you're upset when your sports idol gets defeated.
If there's something that you're dreaming of then may it all come true, because you deserve it all... HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had, and what you've learned from them, and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.
May you live to be 100 and may the last voice you hear be mine.
Ashes to ashes, dust to dust.
Hope your Birthday gently breezes into your life all the choicest of things and all that your heart holds dear Have A Fun- Filled Day.
The old believe everything; the middle aged suspect everything: the young know everything.
It takes a long time to grow young.
You know you're old when you're watching the Pacquiao vs Clottey live stream online.
Your birthday is a special time to celebrate the gift of 'you' to the world.
The secret to staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.
A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.
You're old when you're upset when your sports idol gets defeated.
If there's something that you're dreaming of then may it all come true, because you deserve it all... HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had, and what you've learned from them, and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.
May you live to be 100 and may the last voice you hear be mine.
Ashes to ashes, dust to dust.
Hope your Birthday gently breezes into your life all the choicest of things and all that your heart holds dear Have A Fun- Filled Day.
New Year Quotes and Messages
* New Year's Day... now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual. - Mark Twain
* Youth is when you're allowed to stay up late on New Year's Eve. Middle age is when you're forced to. - Bill Vaughan
* New Year's is a harmless annual institution, of no particular use to anybody save as a scapegoat for promiscuous drunks, and friendly calls and humbug resolutions. - Mark Twain
* The proper behavior all through the holiday season is to be drunk. This drunkenness culminates on New Year's Eve, when you get so drunk you kiss the person you're married to. - P. J. O'Rourke
* Now there are more overweight people in America than average-weight people. So overweight people are now average... which means, you have met your New Year's resolution. - Jay Leno
* Drop the last year into the silent limbo of the past. Let it go, for it was imperfect, and thank God that it can go. - Brooks Atkinson
New Year's Resolution: To tolerate fools more gladly, provided this does not encourage them to take up more of my time. - James Agate
* An optimist stays up until midnight to see the New Year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves. - Bill Vaughan
* Many people look forward to the New Year for a new start on old habits. - Anonymous
* May all your troubles last as long as your New Year's resolutions! - Joey Adams
* I made no resolutions for the New Year. The habit of making plans, of criticizing, sanctioning and molding my life, is too much of a daily event for me. - Anais Nin
* Good resolutions are simply checks that men draw on a bank where they have no account. - Oscar Wilde
* I'm a little bit older, a little bit wiser, a little bit rounder, but still none the wiser. - Robert Paul
* A New Year's resolution is something that goes in one Year and out the other. - Anonymous
* From New Year's on the outlook brightens; good humor lost in a mood of failure returns. I resolve to stop complaining. - Leonard Bernstein
* The bad news is time flies. The good news is you’re the pilot. - Michael Altshuler
* Never tell your resolution beforehand, or it's twice as onerous a duty. - John Selden
* It wouldn't be New Year's if I didn't have regrets. - William Thomas
* People are so worried about what they eat between Christmas and the New Year, but they really should be worried about what they eat between the New Year and Christmas. – Anonymous
* The only way to spend New Year's Eve is either quietly with friends or in a brothel. Otherwise when the evening ends and people pair off, someone is bound to be left in tears. - W.H. Auden
* A New Year's resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other. - Anonymous
* New Year's Eve, where auld acquaintance be forgot! Unless, of course, those tests come back positive. - Jay Leno
* It is better to spend money like there's no tomorrow than to spend tonight like there's no money. - P. J. O'Rourke
* Every New Year is the direct descendant, isn't it, of a long line of proven criminals? - Ogden Nash
* Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could; some blunders and absurdities have crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; you shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
* Youth is when you're allowed to stay up late on New Year's Eve. Middle age is when you're forced to. - Bill Vaughan
* New Year's is a harmless annual institution, of no particular use to anybody save as a scapegoat for promiscuous drunks, and friendly calls and humbug resolutions. - Mark Twain
* The proper behavior all through the holiday season is to be drunk. This drunkenness culminates on New Year's Eve, when you get so drunk you kiss the person you're married to. - P. J. O'Rourke
* Now there are more overweight people in America than average-weight people. So overweight people are now average... which means, you have met your New Year's resolution. - Jay Leno
* Drop the last year into the silent limbo of the past. Let it go, for it was imperfect, and thank God that it can go. - Brooks Atkinson
New Year's Resolution: To tolerate fools more gladly, provided this does not encourage them to take up more of my time. - James Agate
* An optimist stays up until midnight to see the New Year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves. - Bill Vaughan
* Many people look forward to the New Year for a new start on old habits. - Anonymous
* May all your troubles last as long as your New Year's resolutions! - Joey Adams
* I made no resolutions for the New Year. The habit of making plans, of criticizing, sanctioning and molding my life, is too much of a daily event for me. - Anais Nin
* Good resolutions are simply checks that men draw on a bank where they have no account. - Oscar Wilde
* I'm a little bit older, a little bit wiser, a little bit rounder, but still none the wiser. - Robert Paul
* A New Year's resolution is something that goes in one Year and out the other. - Anonymous
* From New Year's on the outlook brightens; good humor lost in a mood of failure returns. I resolve to stop complaining. - Leonard Bernstein
* The bad news is time flies. The good news is you’re the pilot. - Michael Altshuler
* Never tell your resolution beforehand, or it's twice as onerous a duty. - John Selden
* It wouldn't be New Year's if I didn't have regrets. - William Thomas
* People are so worried about what they eat between Christmas and the New Year, but they really should be worried about what they eat between the New Year and Christmas. – Anonymous
* The only way to spend New Year's Eve is either quietly with friends or in a brothel. Otherwise when the evening ends and people pair off, someone is bound to be left in tears. - W.H. Auden
* A New Year's resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other. - Anonymous
* New Year's Eve, where auld acquaintance be forgot! Unless, of course, those tests come back positive. - Jay Leno
* It is better to spend money like there's no tomorrow than to spend tonight like there's no money. - P. J. O'Rourke
* Every New Year is the direct descendant, isn't it, of a long line of proven criminals? - Ogden Nash
* Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could; some blunders and absurdities have crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; you shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
Funny Birthday Quotes
Sharing some funny birthday quotes, as contributed by UFC 107 live stream online.
"My wife hasn’t had a birthday in 4 years. She was born in the year of ... Lord-only-knows"
"Time and Tide wait for no man, but time always stands still for a woman of thirty."
"About the only thing that comes to us without effort is old age."
"For all the advances in medicine, there is still no cure for the common birthday."
"Age is something that doesn’t matter, unless you are a cheese."
"My wife hasn’t had a birthday in 4 years. She was born in the year of ... Lord-only-knows"
"Time and Tide wait for no man, but time always stands still for a woman of thirty."
"About the only thing that comes to us without effort is old age."
"For all the advances in medicine, there is still no cure for the common birthday."
"Age is something that doesn’t matter, unless you are a cheese."
Birthday Love Quotes Batch 4
Growing old is like being increasingly penalized for a crime you have not committed.
When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
I’m sixty years of age. That’s 16 Celsius.
When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
I’m sixty years of age. That’s 16 Celsius.
For Your Birthday Love Is Sweet
For your birthday
Love is sweet
What can I say?
Except where's my treat?
For your birthday
Love is sweet
Let's go away
We have adventure to meet
For your birthday
Love is sweet
Once again I'll say
I love you...
Now let's eat!
Love is sweet
What can I say?
Except where's my treat?
For your birthday
Love is sweet
Let's go away
We have adventure to meet
For your birthday
Love is sweet
Once again I'll say
I love you...
Now let's eat!
Funny Happy Birthday Poem
Happy Bonking Day,
Already I've given a clue
Here's another...
Wear your birthday suit
Guess what present I've got for you
Enjoy, Birthday Boy
Already I've given a clue
Here's another...
Wear your birthday suit
Guess what present I've got for you
Enjoy, Birthday Boy
Birthday Love Quotes Batch 3
Men grow old, pearls grow yellow, there is no cure for it.
Life is one long process of getting tired.
Let us respect gray hairs, especially our own.
Life is one long process of getting tired.
Let us respect gray hairs, especially our own.
A Funny Sexy Birthday Poem
I'd like to scuttle your puttle
Spiddle your paddle
Tickle your wickle
And twittle your taddle
Stroodle your doodle
Cromple your string
Brundle your strundle
And frondle your ding
Happy Birthday
Spiddle your paddle
Tickle your wickle
And twittle your taddle
Stroodle your doodle
Cromple your string
Brundle your strundle
And frondle your ding
Happy Birthday
Funny Birthday Love Quotes
People ask me what I’d most appreciate getting for my eighty-seventh birthday. I tell them, a paternity suit.
A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman’s birthday but never remembers her age.
Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act.
A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman’s birthday but never remembers her age.
Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act.
Birthday Love Wishes & Quotes Batch 2
Enjoy these birthday love wishes and also funny birthday love quotes that you can put in a note to wish your loved one a happy birthday on his or her special day:
Call this an unfair generalization if you must, but old people are no good at everything.
Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen.
Of late I appear To have reached that stage When people who look old Who are only my age.
Call this an unfair generalization if you must, but old people are no good at everything.
Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen.
Of late I appear To have reached that stage When people who look old Who are only my age.
Getting Older Love
It’s birthday time again I see;
Another year's gone by.
We’re older than we used to be;
The thought could make me cry.
For getting older is not such fun,
When there’s hurting in your back,
And it’s agony if you have to run,
And a pleasure to lie in the sack.
Yes getting older is quite a bore,
But to not get old is worse.
So "Happy Birthday!" let’s shout once more,
And to heck with our ride in the hearse!
Hooray for getting older! Happy Birthday and many more.
By Karl Fuchs
Another year's gone by.
We’re older than we used to be;
The thought could make me cry.
For getting older is not such fun,
When there’s hurting in your back,
And it’s agony if you have to run,
And a pleasure to lie in the sack.
Yes getting older is quite a bore,
But to not get old is worse.
So "Happy Birthday!" let’s shout once more,
And to heck with our ride in the hearse!
Hooray for getting older! Happy Birthday and many more.
By Karl Fuchs
Birthday Love Quotes Batch 1
A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday.
The return of my birthday, if I remember it, fills me with thoughts which it seems to be the general care of humanity to escape.
Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest.
The return of my birthday, if I remember it, fills me with thoughts which it seems to be the general care of humanity to escape.
Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest.
SNUD2NMI Text Message
I was at the office and then it came
A text message that said SNUD2NMI
At first I didn't understand
What SNUD2NMI meant
And then I realized
It was a code I should comprehend
SNUD2NMI meant you're there already
And so where am I
Oh yes now I remember
It's your birthday love
And we're having lunch together
And so I stood and went on my way
But first I had to reply
W8LNGJNMI
A text message that said SNUD2NMI
At first I didn't understand
What SNUD2NMI meant
And then I realized
It was a code I should comprehend
SNUD2NMI meant you're there already
And so where am I
Oh yes now I remember
It's your birthday love
And we're having lunch together
And so I stood and went on my way
But first I had to reply
W8LNGJNMI
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